Take What You Can Get

My lifelong friend's mom is in her "end stage" as I write.  The family is sitting in a vigil awaiting her death.  Her mom has dementia and has not been the smart and personable person they used to know for quite some time.  In some ways her death will be a blessing for all concerned.  And yet, every death is mourned by the people who remain. My friend is now nostalgic for the days that she sat with her mother and repeated each conversation tidbit ten times.  One day changes everything in our lives.

I now have a different slant on MY mother's condition.  Of course I always have known that some day I will deal with her death and that I will mourn the loss for the rest of my days.  But, now I also treasure the times that my mother can still converse and occasionally really interact in the "old" way.  Lately my mother has been a little sharper and interactive thanks to a new psychiatrist's view of medicating her anxiety.  She is more alert and even has a shred of her sense of humor back, which was always an integral part of her personality and buried in the haze of medication.  I am not imagining these changes, or putting more importance on them.  I do not delude myself into believing that anything will be constant--I know that one minute she can be so lucid, and the next she will slide back into the clouded mental state of dementia.  I know that some day I will be in my friend's position.  But, for now I will enjoy the momentary glimpses of the mother I once knew and take what I can get.